Welcome to NextLetter, where Frederik Pferdt helps you become one step closer to your next opportunity.

Turn Your Beast into Beauty

Three years ago, my son had to take an elective theater course in school.

Introverted and shy like me (being on stage at that age would have been a nightmare for me), he had no interest in the drama side of the course. Sing? Dance? Speak in front of an audience? No thank you.

So he decided to take on a role handling the lighting—an obviously important support responsibility in the production of shows. My son took to it and liked the work, and his instructor admired what he did, so much so that my son was asked to return to do lighting on future shows. 

My son’s experience in the lighting job made him more comfortable in the theater environment, and he noticed how his friends enjoyed being on stage. That next year, he leapt in to do something he never thought he would. He took on a small on-stage role.

What happened next is something that has been a transformative experience for him—and me.

This past year, he applied for the leading role in the school’s show. He got the part and performed as the lead in Beauty and the Beast.

He loved the experience so much that he made it a part of his coursework for entering high school, and theater has become one of the main things, other than sports, that he has really fallen for.

My son’s performance moved me in so many ways—and not just in the proud-parent fashion. 

His journey reinforced the lesson that you can’t judge things right from the start. Being open and curious and experimental—all part of the dimensions for a future-ready mindstate—will lead you down a path that perhaps you never wanted to go down or never even knew existed.

What a powerful reminder that obligations can evolve into passions.

As long as you remain open to the possibilities.

Quote I Love

The Rules We Follow—and the Rules We Make

During a recent trip to Germany, I was struck again by the meticulous attention to rules that govern everyday life. Traffic signs, for example, dictate not just how we move but when and where we do so. In some areas, I found myself getting off my bike and walking it because a sign insisted on it, only to discover later that the sign was outdated and no longer necessary.

(It may also be the reputation that we Germans [and many people from other countries as well] tend to over-plan and over-structure their lives. The old joke goes that when fire was discovered, instead of looking at all the possibilities, Germans would immediately make sure they knew how to escape if a fire grew out of control.)

This cycling experience left me wondering: How many other "rules" do we follow simply because they're there, not because they still make sense? 

Think of recycling—an admirable practice, but one that is often rigidly enforced. Sometimes, the rules overshadow the original intention: Recycling is about sustainability and mindfulness. It’s as if the rules (blue bin, orange bin, absolutely no lids!) become more important than the principle behind it: let’s not use as many things that need recycling or are wasteful. 

I’m not advocating a rule-breaking society, but I am challenging you to think about some rules that we just follow and take for granted without thinking about the meaning behind them.

One example from home life: Let’s say you’ve divided up house chores among the family—one child does this, one child does that, you do this, your partner does that. It’s a constant battle to hold everyone accountable. Why do you want to spend your energy as the enforcer? 

The bigger theme is that it takes a team to maintain the house, so how can you foster that camaraderie and spirit that you all have a shared interest in making your home the way you want? I’m not suggesting that it would be a simple switch you can make overnight, but reframing some “rules” into principles—and then living with those principles in mind—may change the way you approach, live, and experience your life.

Where “No Rules” is the Rule

This year marks the third time I’ve been to Burning Man—an event that embraces art and community, and an event that doesn’t operate with rules, but with shared principles. There, nothing is for sale—people bring their food and water, they gift their commodities and services (and hugs) to each other, they leave no trace by bringing out what they brought in. And they live for days with a spirit that community and kindness is the guiding principle.

And it is a beautiful thing to experience, even when heavy rains stranded 70,000 people in 2023. Strike that. Especially when heavy rains stranded us.

What if, instead of rigidly following rules, we allowed space for human kindness, understanding, and the occasional bending of the norm when it made sense?

The future we are creating should be one where we question outdated rules and replace them with principles that bring us closer together and to the world we inhabit.

Some lessons from Burning Man: Gifting could inspire us to offer our talents and ideas more freely in our workspaces. Leave No Trace could encourage us to be more thoughtful about the legacy we leave behind in every interaction and project.

We may not always control the rules set before us, but we can focus on what’s within our control—our actions, our attitudes, and our interactions with others.

Doing that, we can create a future that aligns with our values and aspirations.

The Most Important Lesson About Vacations

As summer comes to an end, I started to think about the notion of vacation—and the idea that so many of us latch onto grand plans as our means of escape. New journeys, new places, new adventures.

I love the growth and joy that can come from exploration and experimentation, but I also think about how maybe we’ve unfairly set up a dichotomy between our work life and our vacation life—that all our resting and re-charging must come from these few weeks when we escape to oceans, mountains, or foreign cities. (Many of also know that these getaways sometimes aren’t as relaxing as they seem, as we all have likely said we need a “vacation after their vacation.”)

Interestingly, the concept of vacation itself is another rule set by society—an expectation that during certain times of the year, we should disconnect, feel relaxed, and return rejuvenated. There's a subtle pressure to conform to this idea, to ensure that during this "vacation rule," we fulfill the expectation of relaxation and calm. But what if we redefined this rule?

So my challenge for you is to think about ways to add more “vacation” to your life. Take more walks in new-to-you places. Try new foods. Soak in the sights close to you that you take for granted.

They become mini-explorations added to your regular life—not separate from your regular life.

Think for a moment about how you can harness the joy of “time off”—and include it not as something to look forward to many months away, but things you can do weekly or daily to stop thinking about needing an escape from work, but rather infusing your life with many moments of renewal that sustain and power us all throughout the year.

Let me know something new you tried this summer. What did you learn from the experience? How can you add that same spirit into your day-to-day life? Respond to this email, and I may share your experience in a future NextLetter. My new book, What’s Next is Now, is available now.

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